Stranger

for a moment

it shines

the new self

the being created

a reminder

that

change is real

the dinge of the past

acknowledged

set aside

can be polished

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i have been spoiled by the couch

occupying it, cat like

picking the spot that doesn’t give quite enough room

to it’s other inhabitants

I have been spoiled by the tv

wide and bright and full of sounds and dancing colors

I have been spoiled by the dynamics

of another person

taking up space like air, filling the nooks and dust motes

with awareness if not sound

I have been spoiled with love

leaking it through every pore

weeping into laughter

I have been spoiled with loneliness

the flattening ache

so bluntly unfamiliar to me

where it used to hunt me and haunt me

through crowds of friends

I have been spoiled by my own decisiveness

so used to my mind eyeing my heart

tempering it and flying forward

ignoring nerves

I sit now, lonely

isolated in my single chair

ghostly before the light of my computers screen

the silence filled only with my own breathe

unsure how to proceed.

Wallowing in what used to be me,

missing myself as I am now.

Impossible Infinities

Spell Shoes

I can hear it
a voice that silently whispers
all the things I want to hear
I can hear it
the whispers and hisses
of all the things I fear
effects and affects
hurts and hopes
I want one voice to be real
so badly I fear it
I want the tones to be harmony
so deeply I will it
I crave directness
patience will tell
I crave touch
waiting is hell
But on through the dawn and the days
finding my path
wandering in the maze
focus flourishes
love endures
my life slowly blooming
into something more
I quietly watch
reading the signs
wondering which belongs to what voice
or all they all mine?